Woman reflects on her and twin sister’s battles with abuse
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Delola Burley, 44, of Palatka visits the grave of her identical twin sister, Detret Burley, who in 2015 was killed in a double homicide-suicide in East Palatka.
Delola Burley of Palatka knows what it feels like to be depressed, sad and afraid.
The 44-year-old lost her identical twin sister, Detret Burley, then 37, in a domestic violence-related double homicide-suicide Jan. 14, 2015.
Her sister and her friend, Travis Hall, were shot and killed by an ex-boyfriend in the parking lot of an East Palatka restaurant. The ex-boyfriend then killed himself at the same location.
Burley remembers being in Bible study when she got the call her sister had died.
“That day, my sister had gotten at least 30 calls from her ex,” she said. “When she got off work at 3 p.m., she went to the courthouse to request a restraining order. It was denied because of insufficient evidence.”
October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Victims of domestic violence face a healing process that is often long and painful, according to Shirley Edwards, a victim advocate for the Palatka Police Department.
“Domestic violence victims can suffer for a lifetime,” she said, “because most of the time, the violence comes at the hand of someone they loved and thought they could trust.”
Burley recalls many conversations with her sister when her sister would talk about the threats her ex was making toward her and the frustration she felt after law enforcement was called several times, but was unable to do anything.
“We knew he would say crazy things, but we didn’t know he would go that far,” Burley said.
She said her sister left behind five children, ranging in ages from 5 to 19 at the time, who would sometimes have to go to live with family.
“I believe no one should have to live in fear,” Burley said. “A lot of women seem to be embarrassed until it goes so far and then they want to get out. I believe it’s very important to plan an escape to get out of the abuse.”
Burley said her sister and her ex had dated on and off for four years before the fateful day.
“When she threatened to leave him, he got physical,” she said.
Burley was also dealing with her own mental abuse at the time.
“My husband and I were married for about six or seven years, but (were) together 17 years,” she said. “I don’t even remember a good moment.”
Finally tired of the abuse, Burley knew she needed help and found it through the Palatka Police Department’s victim advocate, who helped her secure shelter and helped with procuring a restraining order.
“That’s when I got my kids and got out,” she said. “I fell into a depression and started having health issues. I knew I had to get help and get out of the situation.”
Raised in Palatka, the twin girls were born April 4, 1977.
“My sister and I always had a passion for interior decorating — that’s what we always did,” Burley said.
Today, Burley is the proud owner of Delolas’ Decor and spends many days planning baby showers, weddings and birthday parties for her clients.
“I am the balloon queen,” she said, smiling. “I work magic with my balloons and everyone seems to love it.”
Burley said she and her sister were very close.
“We were around each other pretty much every day, and when we didn’t see each other, we would talk on the phone,” she said.
Burley has children of her own with her ex-husband and is happy to be a survivor.
“My sister had her whole life ahead of her,” she said. “She was a really good person and people from all over would tell me how much they miss her. She was a kind and compassionate person who would do anything to put a smile on your face.”
Burley considered her sister the light of the family.
“She was the oldest,” she said. “She kept us going and it was devastating losing her.”
For Burley, domestic violence robbed her of feeling safe in her own house.
“It messes you up mentally,” she said.
After losing her sister, Burley stays focused and driven to keep their business going.
“It was one of those things we loved doing together,” she said. “When we would set up for a party and see the smiles on people’s faces when they would come in, it was so rewarding.”
Today, when not planning parties, Burley enjoys spending time with her kids and her sister’s children.
“I get a lot of joy out of spending time with them,” she said.
Burley wants others to know there is life to be lived after being a victim of domestic violence.
“It can be a beautiful life,” she said. “Oh my God, it makes me appreciate life more and know my self-worth.”
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